One of those things that men find so important (at least from what I understand from being a guy and from reading various literature on the subject), is that we long to be the “hero”. Being the father of two little girls and the husband of a wonderful wife certainly helps meet the “hero” need. Something about the way my little girls respond to me is amazing.
For example, when I walk in the room and Celeste – who’s not even one – lights up and says, “Dada!” and then smiles and shows her gums and four teeth. Or the way Chloe not only runs up to give “Daddy” hugs but also the way she talks about me…
One goal for spring break was to do a swing set for Chloe. So for the past several weeks Melissa and I have been researching sets, I’ve been visiting places to look at how to build them, and we’ve been pricing them. After a lot of research and discussion we decided to purchase a do-it-yourself kit. The kit included all the materials, then we purchased the lumber. Thursday evening I spent cutting all the lumber and sorting it, then Friday my dad came over and we spent 8 hours building the set; then Saturday he came back and we spent another 8 hours finishing it. All told, it took about 18 hours to put the thing together (and we really didn’t make that many mistakes!). We ended up saving somewhere between 50-65% by using a kit instead of purchasing a pre-built one (which we couldn’t afford).
Every day Chloe would wake up (either from her nap or in the morning) and ask, “Is my swing set done?” And then every day when she saw friends or talked to someone on the “phone” she would tell them, “My Daddy is building a swing set.” (with My being emphasized). Now that it’s up she get so excited – she’s said “Thank you, Daddy” more times than I can count, and she’s even been inviting the neighbors over to play in her yard and on in her club house.
Not to mention that Melissa and I got to go out twice this week on dates without the girls – once on Monday for a day of kayaking (11 miles) and then again today to have a picnic at the park. Seeing the way she and the girls light up when they see me helps fill that “hero” need.
So, having said that, if you’re reading this and your married – make sure your husband knows he’s your hero. Because it makes all the difference in the world. Wives and daughters have a great ability to make husbands/fathers feel that way (and maybe sometimes we don’t even deserve it).